My current band practices at a facility that neighbors Steve Albini’s studios, Electrical Audio, and oftentimes I feel a bit humbled traveling in such close proximity to a massively well fitted studio, not to mention its head engineer. Occasionally I’ll peruse his gear and mic listings with an envious lust, and cast longing glances at the unassuming brick building that houses his space. Despite these occasional attacks of gear envy, I’ve never thought Ape Trax (well not for a long time now) to be under-equipped. I’ve got the tools to do what any band could probably ask for in some way or another, and short of those Tympani I saw on craigslist the other day, no sonic possibility is too far out of reach. With such a preponderance in digital possibilities, do-with-whatcha-got know-how, and knack for creative alternatives, I rarely feel the need to give an artist an outright “no” when they ask for, say, a string quartet in their backbeat.
Me and the band were taking a short break outside the practice facility one day, when we met a gentleman we later affectionately labled “bike shorts dude” pull up on his fancy mountain bike. The facility is used by hundreds of other bands, players and performers, so it wasn’t unusual to strike up a conversation. What followed was the most grueling 20 or so minutes of cock-waving I’ve experienced in recent memory.
Bike Shorts Guy seemed intent on giving us a detailed catalog of his space in the facility, stacked to the ceiling with some of the most drool-inducing vintage and boutique gear imaginable. Don’t get me wrong, I am not snubbing my nose at the thought of possessing a mint Hammond B3 with two refurbished leslies, but when someone is gonna try and start a pissing match with me, my spine stiffens and I just go all frosty. My guitarist Bryce happened to be with me at the time, so some verbal sparring went on long enough to gauge Bike Shorts Dude’s general view of his musical equipment, and for that matter, the world. He definitely seemed to be more of a collector than a player, putting the rarity and price tag of his gear above actual use. Just as the barely concealed vocal tensions took a turn towards his nearby bicycle, I managed to extricate myself from the conversation and soon forgot about it.
However, just a couple days later I was at a local music retailer for some patch cables and decided to linger in pro audio for a moment to drool over some microphones. Fate dealt me a hardy backhand that day, because I ran into Bike Shorts Guy AGAIN arguing with the employees about the relative merits of certain microphones. (He wasn’t even buying anything! he was just standing there arguing and being a dick!)
Predictably, Bike Shorts was of the opinion that the $3000 mic locked up in the glass case was the end-all be-all and why would any self-respecting audio enthusiast deign to use anything less? A couple of employees attempted to explain, patiently, that each mic has its own characteristics, and that one might prefer to use a lower-priced dynamic for certain applications, even though, yes sir, that Neumann you’ve got your eye on is very sweet indeed. It’s just all in what you want out of your sound. (here I imagine the employees were trying to salvage a sale) Bike Shorts Guy stared at them blankly for a moment and simply said
“THIS mic (pointing at the price tag of a $400 dollar mic) will never do what THAT mic (pointing at the aforementioned Neumann) will.”
Eyerolls abound, I motioned a helpful eye roll to the pro audio floorstaff, put my hood up and got the hell out of there before I got sucked into another conversation with Bike Shorts Guy.
The point the sales staff valiantly tried to make was an excellent one.
Any mic — or any piece of gear, for that matter — regardless of its price tag has its own inherent strengths and weaknesses.
This was actually a mistake I made early on in my recording career, when the first time the studio got its hands on a nice tube mic I just stuck it in front of everything. The mix engineer had a (justified) cow at me and set me straight immediately thereafter. “What the hell dude?!? You know there’s a perfectly good MD 421 over there.”
The lesson here should be comforting news to anybody recording on a budget. You don’t always need top-dollar gear to get good sounds. Just listen extra hard to the stuff you already have, and learn to make the most of it. Again, I’m not denying the high end stuff it’s proper due. I just take exception to Bike Shorts Guy’s thinking that anything less is too pedestrian to consider. We all start somewhere.